|(image from the situationist.wordpress.com)|
When we hold onto regrets, it hinders our ability to fully enjoy life. It creates a darkness that clouds our inner joy. To truly enjoy life we need to make peace with our past by accepting it for what it was. Release any thoughts about how the past should have been any different than it was. These types of thoughts are pointless and they only serve to disturb your peace of mind. Come to accept that whatever happened is now over now.. To think about how you wish it had been different is riding on a train of thought that leads to emotional suffering. Don't be attached to imaginary past scenarios by rewriting history in your mind. Use your imagination to focus on future dreams, not to torture yourself with thoughts of what should have been or what could have been.
For some people “what could have been” thoughts are the root of personal regret. You may look back and ponder different choices you might have made that would have resulted in different events occurring. As tempting as this negative mind candy can be, we must be aware of how destructive this way of thinking is to our peace of mind. The “could have been” scenarios reinforce the negative emotions about what actually happened. It won't help you get past the regret, it will ignite it with each thought of “if I had only done this”.
Be aware that you made choices in the past that made sense at the time according to knowledge you had and the state of mind you were in at that time. Forgive yourself for doing the best you could. That is all anyone ever does. Don't let the "what ifs" take over your mind and hijack your emotions. Accept the past for what it was and move forward.
No amount of thinking can change the past, but thinking too much about how you wish it were different will change your present into living hell of regret.
Be Happy, my Friends-
Laura Barrette Shannon